One Step Forward, Two Steps Back

June 23, 2012

This has been a trying month! And it is not over yet. Some days I find myself simply praying for enough self-control to get to bed time. At the end of the day I sit down and think ‘I must be doing something wrong.’ Maybe I could have a Biblical Super Nanny film an average week in our home and then come and tell me where things have gone wrong. Then again, maybe not.

Somewhere in the midst of trying to finish school, sort through our belongings accumulated over the last seven years in anticipation of moving, hosting Much Beloved Cousin for a week, and planning three birthday parties, I forgot to be a Godly example to my children. There was yelling, sarcasm and general leave-me-alone-I-don’t-feel-like-dealing-with-you. We had our good moments but I would have to say they were outnumbered by the bad.

When the children would interfere with something I was doing I’d tell them to go away instead of finding a way to include them. When they were fighting with each other I would yell and punish everyone instead of helping them to resolve their conflict. And when they were just plain annoying I would echo back their words with mocking instead of taking a deep breath and lovingly deal with the issue.

As my attitude and behavior remained negative those of my children were worsening. As their attitudes and behavior remained negative mine worsened. We were on a downward spiral. If I didn’t change soon complete chaos would soon rule our home. That is when I purposed to push the reset button and begin again. That night I threw up my prayers to God and asked Him to help. The next morning I posted my plans with my accountability group and we were off to the races.

It has been almost a week and things are beginning to improve. I haven’t yelled…too loudly. I’ve taken the time to listen to them and work through whatever bothers them. And we take a time out to reconcile after fighting. But what I have found most helpful is asking my children to do something instead of demanding they do it. 

That ye put off concerning the former conversation the old man, which is corrupt according to the deceitful lusts; and be renewed in the spirit of your mind; and that ye put on the new man, which after God is created in righteousness and true holiness. – Ephesians 4:22-24

AT'TITUDE, n. [L. actus, ago.

1. In painting and sculpture, the posture or action in which a figure or statue is placed; the gesture of a figure or statue; such a disposition of the parts as serves to express the action and sentiments of the person represented.

2. Posture; position of things or persons; as, in times of trouble let the prince or a nation preserve a firm attitude.