|Clipart found on hawaiidermatology.com|
So we’ve been struggling with the question of whether we’re getting through to our children’s hearts. Do they really hear what we’re telling them?
One of our goals is to teach our children the sanctity of marriage. We believe God made one woman for each man and that He will bring the two together when the time is right. Toward that goal we have been teaching our children that they belong to their spouse right now. And that they must keep themselves pure both emotionally and physically. There will be no dating in this house. But neither will we arrange their marriage (though I do have a candidate in mind for each-I can’t help myself!).
And so we have been planting seeds. We’ve been instructing them on the roles of a spouse according to Scripture. What does God demand of a husband and father? What does it look like to be a Godly wife and mother?
Well the other day the children were playing a game when I heard Little Big Boy Man asking Sweetie Pie #1 if he could marry her. TEACHABLE MOMENT! My husband was right on it. He called the children to his side and ran through what should happen. He told Sweetie Pie #1 that if any man approaches her and wants to spend time with her or asks to marry her, she is to say “Go talk to my Dad.” He told Little Big Boy Man that if he is ever interested in spending time or marrying a woman, he must first come to us and then to her father. He then proceeded to pepper Little Big Boy Man with questions about his relationship with God, his family, his ability to care for our daughter, and why he wanted to spend time/marry her.
Naturally, he had no answers to these questions, so my husband began to tell him why these things are important. We talked about guarding your heart, preparing yourself for marriage and family, and the realities of family life. I will admit that it could have been more information than was needed, but if only a small portion sunk in right now I’ll consider it a job well done.
Now when we hear “Can I marry you?”, we also hear “Go talk to my Dad.” Then Little Big Boy Man dutifully presents himself before my husband.
Once, when the scenario was playing itself out, Little Big Boy Man refused to come speak to my husband and instead insisted she marry him anyway. Sweetie Pie #1 went screaming from the room!